To the Editor:
In the article about lessons on empathy, I found it interesting that teaching empathy would start in the middle school atmosphere, which is known to be harsh, hyper-critical and sometimes just plain mean.
But is teaching empathy, a concept that comes from life experience, truly acceptable?
Children of that age group should be allowed to like or dislike whomever they please, and simply because another child is excluded does not mean that he or she is being bullied. It could very well mean that the excluded child does not have the social skills necessary to make or keep friends.
Why does the school not have lessons on teaching how to make friends in an environment that can seem unwelcoming at first?
By forcing children to merely “get along” with everyone for the sake of empathy, the school could be doing just the opposite. It could be instilling resentment for higher authority, and even for the children who are supposed to benefit.
Simply put, empathy should be cultivated from real experiences, not from a teacher telling you what should and should not be done.
Alicia Ramirez
Chicago, April 6, 2009
Note from KBJ: I love this paragraph of the New York Times story:
Annie Gevertz, 12, said that she is more careful of what she says about other students. “Sometimes, I think about how it would feel if it were said about me, and I’ll keep it to myself instead of sharing,” she said, though she expects gossip will probably never be gone for good “because we’re teenage girls and that’s something we do.”
Social engineering runs up against human nature.
